What Matters Most
"The things that matter most in life ... aren't things."
"The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience."
— Eleanor Roosevelt
What Matters Most
Chasing Influence: Transformational Coaching to Build Champions for Life
What does success mean for you? You’ll hear a lot about sacrifice, balance, and priorities as people wrangle with this important question. What does matter the most to us?
In a sociological study conducted by Dr. Anthony Campolo,[1] 50 individuals over the age of 95 were asked a simple yet thought-provoking question: "If you could live your life again, what would you do differently?" The open-ended question about regret yielded three consistent answers.
The first answer that emerged was that the participants would reflect more. Dr. Campolo emphasized that many people are "absent when they're present," and without reflection, we end up being busy but not necessarily fulfilled. The elderly individuals in the study expressed that they would take the time to stop, think, and consider with intensity the things they took for granted the first time around. They recognized the importance of reflecting upon the things that have real personal significance and cherishing life's precious moments, including family.
The second answer that emerged was that the participants would take more risks. According to Dr. Campolo, risk is a way of living life to the fullest. He encouraged people, regardless of age or circumstances, to "boldly go where no one has gone before" and pursue their dreams and visions. The senior citizens in the study recognized that you cannot have relationships, a fulfilling career, or a sense of purpose without taking risks.
The third and final answer that emerged was that the participants would do more things that would live on after they were gone. Dr. Campolo emphasized the importance of living for things that last beyond our earthly life. He asked, "What are people going to put on your gravestone?" Those who’d lived almost 100 years recognized the significance of making a positive difference in someone else's life and leaving the world a better place.
Don’t let life pass you by. Life is not a contest. Live life to the fullest and follow your dreams. Make a difference—it doesn’t need to be spectacular, you just need to positively influence someone else’s life and do your best to leave the world a better place!
“People may spend their whole lives climbing the ladder of success only to find, once they reach the top, that the ladder is leaning against the wrong wall.”
— Thomas Merton
Connecting this quote to the story. The study's findings encourage individuals to reflect on their lives to ensure they pursue what truly matters to them. By doing so, they can ensure that the ladder they are climbing is leaning against the right wall and that they are not wasting their time and energy on pursuits that will not ultimately bring them happiness and fulfillment.
This week’s Chasing Influence tip: Don’t let life pass you by. There is so much to cherish in life—take the time to stop, pay attention, and appreciate those we love and who love us.
If you enjoyed this story, a series of three Chasing Influence workbooks is available. Stories are accompanied by discussion questions and answers. Each workbook contains 33 lessons to use with any team.
Updates on Chasing Influence
Chasing Influence: Transformational Coaching to Build Champions for Life is available in Kindle, softcover, hardcover, and audiobook editions.
For additional resources, links to podcast appearances, and other Chasing Influence news, click here.
©Troy Urdahl, 2024
[1] References to study by John Maxwell and Dr. Anthony Campolo. Original source of study unknown.