Be the (Only) One
Be the (Only) One
The Importance of Being - and Embracing - Yourself
“Be yourself, everyone else is taken.”
– Oscar Wilde
Be the (Only) One
Where does your leadership philosophy come from? In his book, Win Forever, football coach Pete Carroll writes about an unlikely source of coaching philosophy and inspiration for an NFL head coach: The Grateful Dead. The Grateful Dead is one of the most influential rock bands of the 20th Century and Coach Carroll tells the story of an interview he heard with the now-deceased lead singer of this iconic band, Jerry Garcia.
Carroll explains, “I can’t remember exactly what question the interviewer asked him, but it was something along the lines of ‘How do you feel about being possibly the greatest rock and roll band of all time?’ A classic softball question, but rather than responding with the usual fluff, Jerry said something I’ll never forget. ‘No, man.’ He answered ever so relaxed. ‘That’s not how we think of ourselves at all. We don’t want to be the best ones doing something—we want to be the only ones doing it.’”
Garcia’s reply stuck with a young Carroll for the rest of his life. Garcia was onto an important concept that has helped shape Carroll’s approach to coaching. “The best performers, whether athletes, entertainers, or anybody else trying to do anything well, are the ones who aren’t trying to win by playing someone else’s game. Each person is made up of a unique combination of strengths, weaknesses, abilities, and talents, and any one of us can only truly maximize our potential in the context of that individual’s makeup. That’s why it doesn’t make sense to think about competition in the context of any one opponent.”
Carroll said, “To be all by yourself out there doing something that nobody else can touch—that’s the thought that guides me, that guides this program: We’re going to do things better than it’s ever been done before in everything we do, and we’re going to compete our [butts] off. And we’re gonna see how far that takes us.”
What makes you different? What do you do that no one else can? And, what do our team members do that makes them special?
“You cannot build a company or manage a life by chasing others; you have to find your success competing against yourself. There will always be a bigger fish.”
– Michael Gerber
Connecting this quote to the story. The quote and story promote the value of uniqueness and individuality, striving to do things better in your own way rather than competing against others while emphasizing how true success comes from self-improvement and being the best version of oneself, rather than focusing on external competition.
This week’s Chasing Influence tip: We must take care of ourselves in order to lead others!
If you enjoyed this story, a series of three Chasing Influence workbooks is available. Stories are accompanied by discussion questions and answers. Each workbook contains 33 lessons to use with any team.
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©Troy Urdahl, 2023